I’m pretty good at saying the wrong thing. It’s almost like a cross between being psychic and having Tourette’s. Friends will look at me with saucer-wide eyes, too stunned to utter what is evident in their expressions: “Did you really just say that?” All I can do is give a shrug. Yeah. I said it.

Some people don’t like honesty. I’m not always good at diplomacy. So a podcast seemed like a good fit.

Image for post
Image for post

If we’ve learned anything in the past seven months, it’s that this pandemic can drive people to do strange things. I mean, I went to film…

I am a big fan of “Below Deck”. The original, that is. To me, it’s the crown jewel of Bravo TV. Fans have adored Kate Chastain since her debut in season two and the Stud of the Sea from the start. The connection Kate and Captain Lee created after the “rocket ship” incident carried over to their off-camera lives, adding a level of authenticity that’s lacking in so many other Bravo shows (I’m talking to you, Housewives). …

Thirteen years ago today, my first book, A Sassy Little Guide to Getting Over Him, was published. It was more or less an accident. You see, a friend of mine got dumped and called me right after it happened. I was in the middle of writing my first novel, so I was a sure bet to be home. I dropped everything and went right over to console.

In the twenty minutes it took me to get there, on that late June afternoon, she must have called everyone in her contacts because, by the time I arrived, she was on the…

This past Saturday was Indie Author Day, a national event started by Biblioboard and their Indie Author Project back in 2016. On the second Saturday in October, libraries organize events (educational, workshopping and networking) that bring together the literary communities of burgeoning writers and local authors. It’s a pretty great thing. I encourage you to note that day on your calendars and seek out local events. You’ll meet some amazing people. Promise.

This year, I was kindly invited to participate in a panel discussion about the challenges indie authors face. Specifically, in Los Angeles. My friend and fellow indie author…

Image for post
Image for post

She knew it was coming. A long time coming. When he started therapy without asking her to join him, she knew then it was time to up her game. The typical tactics weren’t working. She was accustomed to waiting him out, placating him just enough to make him soften, just enough for him to see that, whatever the issue was, it wasn’t worth pursuing. Things didn’t really need to change. He just needed to accept how they were. He would come to his senses, eventually.

She was used to getting her way.

He wasn’t pushing, but he wasn’t giving in…

Confession: I have a Google Alert for “chick lit”. It’s a term I have little choice but to endure because I am an author who has a vagina and writes about single women, and those single women aren’t trying to solve the disappearance and/or murder of another woman. They also aren’t shopping, obsessed with shoes or getting married or having a baby or even having it all, which puts me in kind of a no-man’s-land…but with vaginas. Therefore, “chick lit”. (Or, if we continue to allow Amazon to dominate the world: “Single Women Fiction.” Um, no. No. Absolutely not. No.)

Image for post
Image for post
Image Source

I’m sure you have at least one in your life — a self-publisher. Today, getting a book out in the world is fairly simple: Basically, drain soul at keyboard, suffer solitude and a Vitamin D deficiency while crafting the story, then pull out hair editing and formatting the tome. When all that’s done, and the book is uploaded on multiple platforms, the real work begins…badgering people to buy it/read it/review it.

Lucky you, right? You’re just an innocent bystander who used to have a normal friend who did things like go out to dinners or brunches or movies, maybe even…

Image for post
Image for post

No one can hold a grudge longer than me. I’m an Aries with a Scorpio rising, instilled with a righteous sense of right and wrong. It doesn’t take much for me to get pissed and cut you out of my life for good.

But I’m evolving.

There’s an ancient bit of wisdom that’s been passed down from St. Augustine, or the Buddha, Nelson Mandela, Anne Lamott, or someone in AA, that declares: “Resentment is like drinking poison and hoping the other person will die.”

Pretty true.

What purpose does resentment serve, anyway? It’s not exactly productive when you think about…

Image for post
Image for post

There was no way she would ever have made a sex tape. No way. Not ever. She wasn’t that type. She didn’t think he was, either.

They had been on a total of five dates. Finally, after a lovely dinner that went on so long that they missed their movie, they went back to his place. That was her first mistake.

Yes, he owned and she rented. Somehow, the homeownership made his place the logical choice. His was a house, hers an apartment. Piggy in the middle of a triplex. It wasn’t as if she lived in a thirty-plus unit…

Image for post
Image for post

I don’t believe in closure. Not one iota.

There’s a charming meme that pops up every once in a while, one about a broken plate and the inability of “sorry” to fix it. It perfectly sums up the myth of closure — the futile wait for the right words to come along and heal the wounds inflicted by someone else. I suppose the meme is meant more for the people who take little responsibility for their actions and think that “sorry” is akin to “abracadabra” — having otherworldly powers to make their err disappear. To me, it better serves those…

Sandra Ann Miller

Writer of wrongs. Author of A SASSY LITTLE GUIDE TO GETTING OVER HIM. Host of A Sassy Little Podcast for Getting Over It. http://sandraannmiller.com

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store